For the longest time my life was always the same. The only thing that would be different was my schedule at school. Day in and day out I was a teller, a student, and a friend to the same group of people.
For the past two years I feel as my surroundings (people and places) and the person I am are constantly changing.
My group of friends drastically changed. I no longer hang out with them due to that group being a huge source of drama. We all changed too much and grew apart. But because of this change I feel that I am more able and comfortable to be myself than ever before.
I moved into a different apartment in a better area.
I ended a very long relationship and started a new one. The new one is the best one yet with someone who takes such awesome care of me. He was the start of being comfortable with being me. He is very understanding and doesn't judge. It makes him happy to see me change and grow. I love that about him.
I also recently decided to join roller derby. That alone will take up a lot of time but it also means new friends and experiences.
Sadly soon my current relationship will end for the time being. He is heading out on the road to perform and travel. It's something he wants to do and is very excited for, but I'm not ready to join him. That means I may not even see him for as long as a year if he doesn't make it over here to the east coast to visit. We both are going to go through a lot of growth and change. It will be interesting to see the result for both of us and to see if we can happily be together again. I love him dearly and the 28th of this month is going to be rough. It hurts to think of him being gone. Thankfully I have amazing friends. They may be in CT but they will be there to help me along.
Even though it's not easy I've found change to be good for me. It's a start to a new you at every turn. No matter the stress it causes it seems to usually be a good thing for me. I'll just have to power through the tough changes.
November 17, 2009
November 11, 2009
I'd be more than happy to hug a vet today.
But he is in Michigan right now visiting his girfriend's family. My brother is a war veteran. When I was little I would never thought he would be one. I thought veteran were just those really old guys that sold flowers outside the supermarket. I was naive. I knew they did something brave and awesome but I thought we were done with making new veterans. I of course didn't really understand human society at the time.
It doesn't feel like it but my brother went to war about 5 years ago. Of course we weren't all that close till just before he left. There is a bit of an age gap. He was stationed in Iraq for a year. It stressed me out so much. At times I'd have to go to my work's break room to stop from crying in front of customers. I knew he wasn't in the front line since he is a black hawk helicopter mechanic but I knew he was being fired at every day with mortars. He definitely had it better than other people's family members, but he was still at war. There were a lot of things that he had to do that I'm glad he didn't tell me till he got back to the US.
The day he got back was awesome. It was Christmas Eve. A lot of my family joined us at the base in Quonset, RI, for the arrival. There were volunteers and soldiers everywhere as we waited. The music was cued as they flew over the base with the Rocky theme playing. They were in those huge military planes that rumbled and made your adrenaline rush. I'm tearing up right now as I remember it. We waited patiently as they filed off of the plane with big smiles. When my brother made it through I think I gave him the biggest hug of my life and bawled my eyes out. It was so awesome to see him home safe and sound.
Now he drives around in his Saab 900, with old man veteran plates on his car at age 30. We should really cut back on making new veterans. It's an unhealthy habit.
It doesn't feel like it but my brother went to war about 5 years ago. Of course we weren't all that close till just before he left. There is a bit of an age gap. He was stationed in Iraq for a year. It stressed me out so much. At times I'd have to go to my work's break room to stop from crying in front of customers. I knew he wasn't in the front line since he is a black hawk helicopter mechanic but I knew he was being fired at every day with mortars. He definitely had it better than other people's family members, but he was still at war. There were a lot of things that he had to do that I'm glad he didn't tell me till he got back to the US.
The day he got back was awesome. It was Christmas Eve. A lot of my family joined us at the base in Quonset, RI, for the arrival. There were volunteers and soldiers everywhere as we waited. The music was cued as they flew over the base with the Rocky theme playing. They were in those huge military planes that rumbled and made your adrenaline rush. I'm tearing up right now as I remember it. We waited patiently as they filed off of the plane with big smiles. When my brother made it through I think I gave him the biggest hug of my life and bawled my eyes out. It was so awesome to see him home safe and sound.
Now he drives around in his Saab 900, with old man veteran plates on his car at age 30. We should really cut back on making new veterans. It's an unhealthy habit.
November 9, 2009
Derbiful!
Last night was our first newbie clinic for rollerderby. I had a great time. The girls are all really nice and I've made some cool friends. Every girl is so interesting and unique in their own way. We got to watch the players scrimage after the newbies got lessons on the basics of speed skating. It was really fun to watch, and Buzzy (the travel team coach) taught us more about the rules and strategy. The more I learn the more I want to play.
But I'm feeling the workout today. I have a lot of exercise ahead of me. I need to spend some time at the gym so I can skate faster and not have sad legs everytime.
But I'm feeling the workout today. I have a lot of exercise ahead of me. I need to spend some time at the gym so I can skate faster and not have sad legs everytime.
November 8, 2009
Non-glitterpires.
Last night I went to see a play written by a friend of mine. Jon did an amazing job writing it, his mother and friends made beautiful music, and the cast showed off all the work beautifully! The play is called "Nightsong".
I love when people asked Jon where this all came from he replies, "I made it all up." No grand explanation of his inspiration. Just that he made it all up. *grin*
He really is a great and talented guy. I never will let him forget that I remember him being in 'James and Giant Peach' for All Children's Theater a loooong time ago. He was the caterpillar in a very embarrassing costume he named the poop suit. Yeah it looked that awesome. But of course even at that young age he was great. He was probably only 7 or 8 at the time.
Something else that was really cool about last night was the venue. It's called St. Ann Arts and Cultural Center. This awesome church has the largest fresco collection in North America. It's pretty amazing. The photo below is a taste. If you click it you'll see the few photos I took last night. Now these frescos are very important and require a certain temperature to be maintained. Well, in order to do so it costs $1800 a WEEK to heat this building. This non-profit organization would really appreciate the donations to keep this art safe.
I was in awe of it. The photos aren't amazing because I was taking pictures of an extremely high ceiling. If I was the painter I probably would have thrown up from being that high. There is no way I could do stuff like this. Please set up my easel on the ground. Kthxbye.
Robert is a 300 - year old vampire, who's been feeling off lately. It doesn't help that Vivienne, his eternal lover, has grown increasingly cold over the years; she views humans as little more than a source of sustenance, while Robert still finds them fascinating. However, a new conquest soon catches Robert's eye: Andrea, a naive human who's been widowed for nearly two years. Desperate to be closer to her -- but not wanting to pursue her physically -- Robert calls upon an ancient, forbidden power known as the Nightsong. Using this power Robert enters Andrea's dreams while she sleeps, drawing her fragile mind ever closer to him.
I love when people asked Jon where this all came from he replies, "I made it all up." No grand explanation of his inspiration. Just that he made it all up. *grin*
He really is a great and talented guy. I never will let him forget that I remember him being in 'James and Giant Peach' for All Children's Theater a loooong time ago. He was the caterpillar in a very embarrassing costume he named the poop suit. Yeah it looked that awesome. But of course even at that young age he was great. He was probably only 7 or 8 at the time.
Something else that was really cool about last night was the venue. It's called St. Ann Arts and Cultural Center. This awesome church has the largest fresco collection in North America. It's pretty amazing. The photo below is a taste. If you click it you'll see the few photos I took last night. Now these frescos are very important and require a certain temperature to be maintained. Well, in order to do so it costs $1800 a WEEK to heat this building. This non-profit organization would really appreciate the donations to keep this art safe.
I was in awe of it. The photos aren't amazing because I was taking pictures of an extremely high ceiling. If I was the painter I probably would have thrown up from being that high. There is no way I could do stuff like this. Please set up my easel on the ground. Kthxbye.
November 6, 2009
You're it!
Getting speeding tickets is like the unfair game of tag as a kid.
I was all happy to get out of work and get home. Joe and Elliot were with me and they were on their way to their first ostrich burgers and I was on my way to relaxation. Then a cop walked out into the road to ruin my day. He just pointed to the side of the road with a stoic look on his face. I didn't freak out at least. Joe said I'm probably the only girl he knows that doesn't break down and cry. Sure I was pissed, but when it comes to authority I'm the keep-it-to-myself pissed person. It gets me in less trouble. If you aren't authority my red-head temper can come out.
Well, 10 mph over the speed limit and I'm hit with a $95 ticket. Thanks a lot Pawtucket. I know it's my fault but $95 is a bit much. Especially in a state where we have one of the highes unemployment rates in the US. Luckily I'm not part of that statistic. I will plead no contest, but here's hoping I get a bit of a break on the fine. I may have a job, but I'm only partime and have rent to pay among other bills. Cross your fingers for me.
Just a thought after a text convo with Joe. Imagine getting in a car accident and just yelling "TAG!" out the window before driving away. I'm sure that would go over well. Hehe...
I was all happy to get out of work and get home. Joe and Elliot were with me and they were on their way to their first ostrich burgers and I was on my way to relaxation. Then a cop walked out into the road to ruin my day. He just pointed to the side of the road with a stoic look on his face. I didn't freak out at least. Joe said I'm probably the only girl he knows that doesn't break down and cry. Sure I was pissed, but when it comes to authority I'm the keep-it-to-myself pissed person. It gets me in less trouble. If you aren't authority my red-head temper can come out.
Well, 10 mph over the speed limit and I'm hit with a $95 ticket. Thanks a lot Pawtucket. I know it's my fault but $95 is a bit much. Especially in a state where we have one of the highes unemployment rates in the US. Luckily I'm not part of that statistic. I will plead no contest, but here's hoping I get a bit of a break on the fine. I may have a job, but I'm only partime and have rent to pay among other bills. Cross your fingers for me.
Just a thought after a text convo with Joe. Imagine getting in a car accident and just yelling "TAG!" out the window before driving away. I'm sure that would go over well. Hehe...
November 3, 2009
Letting go
I have beliefs that are pagan. I don't consider myself Wiccan at all. That's not my style. I guess I'm pretty eclectic or can even be classified as a hedgewitch. One holiday that I like to always celebrate is Samhain. Even if it's just a moment of time outside by myself, I consider that observing the holiday. I like to take that moment to smell the autumn air. I love when the leaves fall. In their piles, they start to break down and release a great smell. Near my house is a beautiful cemetery and I’m planning on taking a walk to check out the changing colors. Hopefully today will be nice enough for that walk.
One of the main aspects of the holiday is remembering the ones you have lost. I haven’t experienced a lot of death in my life at all. My mother’s parents both passed away before I was born. I met my great-grandmother at her funeral. That was an awkward meeting. The only really close relative that has passed away is my Grandfather. And really that is it besides the loss of pets. Growing up, my pets lived long healthy lives. Garfield was a cat that lived to be 20. Max, another cat, lived to be about 17. There were small animals but they don’t live all that long by nature. Our dogs had the same track records as the cats. Sadly though, my Lola died this year way too soon. She was only 4 years old. It was an unfortunate accident that probably wouldn’t have been able to be prevented.
The day before she died I randomly took pictures of her and Zeus. I find it weird how I don’t do it very often but I happened to before she passed. I put the cat condo up on the table while I was vacuuming and she felt the need to be in it in a spot she doesn’t even normally sit. On top of that, her and Zeus were able to share my bed without killing each other. I didn’t have the heart to plug my camera into the computer till Samhain day. I felt it was time for my closure. She was probably the best behaved cat ever. She always was polite enough to wait till I sat up in bed before bothering me for food. Of course she only cuddled on her time but that’s normal for most cats. While sleeping on my bed she was always on the pillow beside mine. Lola never scratched a single piece of furniture either. She is missed and loved. Below is her final photo shoot.
One of the main aspects of the holiday is remembering the ones you have lost. I haven’t experienced a lot of death in my life at all. My mother’s parents both passed away before I was born. I met my great-grandmother at her funeral. That was an awkward meeting. The only really close relative that has passed away is my Grandfather. And really that is it besides the loss of pets. Growing up, my pets lived long healthy lives. Garfield was a cat that lived to be 20. Max, another cat, lived to be about 17. There were small animals but they don’t live all that long by nature. Our dogs had the same track records as the cats. Sadly though, my Lola died this year way too soon. She was only 4 years old. It was an unfortunate accident that probably wouldn’t have been able to be prevented.
The day before she died I randomly took pictures of her and Zeus. I find it weird how I don’t do it very often but I happened to before she passed. I put the cat condo up on the table while I was vacuuming and she felt the need to be in it in a spot she doesn’t even normally sit. On top of that, her and Zeus were able to share my bed without killing each other. I didn’t have the heart to plug my camera into the computer till Samhain day. I felt it was time for my closure. She was probably the best behaved cat ever. She always was polite enough to wait till I sat up in bed before bothering me for food. Of course she only cuddled on her time but that’s normal for most cats. While sleeping on my bed she was always on the pillow beside mine. Lola never scratched a single piece of furniture either. She is missed and loved. Below is her final photo shoot.
November 2, 2009
What's in a name?
So I've started a brand new blog. I think I have outgrown my livejournal. It was fun and cute but very old. A lot in my life has changed since my days of livejournal. There has been transition and a lot of growing up.
So the name? Well, I've been a knitter for a long time now. It's probably the most consistent I've been with a hobby ever. I thoroughly enjoy it and I plan on selling items online. The next two months are busy though so it's on hold for now. But anyway, I liked the play on stitch.
I've also become fond of the phrase "A stitch in time saves nine." It goes with what I needed to work on over time. I had a bad habit of letting things stew rather than taking care of them when it would be less stressful. That goes with communication and projects that I put off. I am a championship procrastinator.
But yeah, that pretty much sums it up. We shall see how this all turns out. Enjoy.
So the name? Well, I've been a knitter for a long time now. It's probably the most consistent I've been with a hobby ever. I thoroughly enjoy it and I plan on selling items online. The next two months are busy though so it's on hold for now. But anyway, I liked the play on stitch.
I've also become fond of the phrase "A stitch in time saves nine." It goes with what I needed to work on over time. I had a bad habit of letting things stew rather than taking care of them when it would be less stressful. That goes with communication and projects that I put off. I am a championship procrastinator.
But yeah, that pretty much sums it up. We shall see how this all turns out. Enjoy.
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